Thank you doctor,
Anxiety during public dealing whether in office or in society, I mean attending social events or meeting or talking to people. Working in a bank as a clerk. I always have a tough mind about what people will say. Heartbeat rises, panic attacks while seeing any kind of fight, or when anyone talks in a high tone. During anxiety, I feel almost dumb and do not know what to do. Sometimes thought of suicide.
Daydreaming, sometimes I want to be an actor, sometimes bodybuilder, etc. I also have too much laziness. Do not want to take an effort but still, daydream that I will become an all-rounder in each field. No interest in anything or season due to tension but still rainy season is my favorite. I sleep in many positions mainly on the back.
I am a pure vegetarian but due to poor appetite unable to eat properly mainly, and cannot eat wheat (flatbreads). Ten years back when I was going to the gym the coach suggested me medicine I do not know which one, but after a week, epilepsy was diagnosed. Actually, that was a mild steroid and I was unaware of that. Till now I had epilepsy five times, during the last nine years.
During childhood parents did not allow me to move outside or play due to overprotection that something wrong may not occur means, I may not mix up with the wrong guys. Shyness since childhood from girls as I never mix up with girls. Short in height and always had an inferiority complex of that. Average in studies. Sometimes teachers scold me without knowing the fact that I have not done anything wrong. I am very emotional and have a deep effect of anything which is against humanity or myself and keep of thinking for a long time like if someone scolds me at the road or anywhere months pass and I go on thinking and weeping. Unable to take decisions, take a long time to take even simple decisions, afraid of taking responsibilities and accepting challenges, even at 38 years I do not want to take promotions because of fear of transfer to a new place and fear of responsibilities. Even while talking I utter in a slow tone and words get stuck. People are unable to understand clearly many times.
I lose my temper easily but due to fear cannot express my anger. Many times I feel angry in front of comrades when I am right but even then impact remains that I am wrong because I am unable to express clearly my feelings. In insulting situations, I prefer to die or run away, this leads to depression. Fear of driving vehicles in the crowd.