How to overcome childhood-rooted social anxieties?

Question

Hello doctor,

I have been suffering from anxiety since childhood. My journey with anxiety began when I was in the fifth grade, though I am unsure if that is where it started. I was always accompanied by my best friend, a sisterly figure. I was a well-behaved and shy student. However, during a class discussion about noisy students, someone, perhaps my best friend, questioned why I was listed, given my quiet nature. The person listing my name commented on my "ugly and loud" voice, and though I do not recall the exact words, the impact stayed with me, a secret burden I carried. Throughout school, I earned a reputation as a reserved student who rarely spoke. Rumors even circulated that I might be mute. While I now have a small circle of friends, occasional feelings of isolation persist, perhaps fueled by my reluctance to engage fully. Reflecting on my childhood, I wonder if a lack of social development contributed to my current state, and I want to change. Attempting to break free from my comfort zone is challenging. Sitting next to someone, especially a boy, triggers breathlessness and discomfort. Speaking in public induces sweating, trembling hands, a racing heart, and a flushed face. I long for change and hope someone can guide me in overcoming these anxieties. Please help.

Thank you.

Answer 1

Hi,

Welcome to icliniq.com.

I have read your query and can understand your concern.

It appears that you have an introverted personality (involves a preference for solitude, inward focus, and a need for quiet environments, with introverts often recharging through alone time), falling under the cluster C personality category, a classification in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (DSM-5), accompanied by an anxiety disorder (excessive worry) that makes it challenging to engage with new people. It is understandable if you prefer solitary activities over social events and have a close-knit circle of friends. Your introverted nature might contribute to a lack of confidence and feelings of inferiority. Accepting yourself is crucial, and there are ways to work on self-improvement.

I suggest some guidelines to help boost your confidence and alleviate anxiety:

Incorporate daily exercises, such as walking, gym workouts, or swimming, for 30 to 45 minutes to enhance your confidence.
Practice meditation for 20 minutes, focusing on normal breathing, to promote relaxation and reduce anxiety.
Consume healthy, home-cooked meals, and steer clear of junk foods.
Ensure you stay hydrated by drinking enough water.
Dedicate quality time to friends and family through personal interactions or video calls, especially if you are away from your family.
Engage in creative hobbies like reading, writing, painting, drawing, or learning new skills and languages to enhance communication skills.
Aim for seven to eight hours of sleep every night.
Avoid tobacco, alcohol, or any substance abuse.

Remember, live your life rather than merely spending it. Be bold and confident. Suppose your symptoms persist after following these guidelines for four to six weeks. In that case, I suggest considering medications for anxiety disorder, a mental health condition characterized by excessive and persistent worry, fear, or anxiety that can interfere with daily life.

I hope this helps.

Please revert in case of further queries.

Thank you.

How to overcome childhood-rooted social anxieties?

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